I didn't listen to Mormon general conference this session. Like most sessions, I skimmed a handful of talks I heard were great and I read in full exactly one, my motives for doing so being mostly self-serving. I wanted to figure out the following quote I had seen reposted by a few girls in various places on the internet:
I thought it was a joke when I first read this little bit and I have to admit I laughed a little bit when I realized that Thomas S Monson, the president of the Mormon church, actually said such an awkward thing in general conference. Thankfully, the quote in context is not so bad, but this "women need to be told they're beautiful" excerpt was so admired by some femalr members that I've seen it posted either as the image or as a reposted quote probably over 10 times. In context, Monson is telling a room full of all men (it was the priesthood session) that members need to be reassured of their worth if they are to feel needed within the church. He adds that men also need to be told that they "amount to something" and "are capable and worthwhile".
That being explained, let me try to put a finger on why I don't think Monson should be saying that women need to be told that they are beautiful in contrast to how men should be told they amount to something. Mostly it has less to do with my problems with the church and more to do with the problems I see other women have with it, as I do not see the church as overwhelmingly patriarchal like some inactive feminists I know. I honestly want what's best for the church-- I would be happy to see it grow if it was in a way that embraced the warmth and values I was brought up with as opposed to encouraging and ever-expanding public image of an army of Mitt and Ann Romney types spewing catchphrases rigged from 1950's lipstick commercials like "women need to be told they're beautiful".
Aside from equating beauty in women to capability in men, Monson is exerting a weird forced sense of authority that just puts a bad taste in your mouth unless you already subscribe to his ideology. Which would be fine if the church only tried to pander to its members, but the Mormon church is so much more than that. Its members and former members already know that the Mormon church is not as sexist as other Christian religious. Nonmembers don't, and they see bits of rhetoric like this posted on the internet and get quite a skewed impression of what Mormonism is all about-- one of a priveledged elderly white man who is head of a patriarchal church within a patriarchal culture telling a room of men what women need to be reassured of their physical attractiveness in order to feel they have an important place in the church.
Basically it comes down to the fact that I couldn't count the amount of weird messed up rumors and misconceptions I've heard about the Mormon church in my life, and I guess I just wish church authorities would stop encouraging them.
